Friday, March 27, 2009

Za2ir al Layl

He has the guts to show up again! After all these years, after all the explanation I gave to myself for his existence in this world, after doing my best to forget his name, he's here! And for the second time this week!

Standing there with his straight emotionless face, at my door, same face I used to see and swear to everyone that he's smiling at me. Oh God, I forgot how much I hate him now. But his presence brings back bunch of memories, sweet and bitter, that I do treasure.

I don't remember how we first met but I'm sure it was in my grandma's house when I was very young, maybe 5 years old or even younger. I never liked him and my grandma used to tell me "Just ignore him. Forget he's there"

All mischief happens when he's around. I remember once I was very annoyed for his presence and I decided to raise the broom to scare him and since the broom stick was taller than me, as well as my young sister, it fell on her head and she was taken to the ER and she came home with couple of stitches in her head. She always blames ME for that and not him! Not even once!

And there he is standing as high as the door, pretending he's cool. But I swear I saw him breathing fast and could count his heartbeats. I was told once that he senses other's heartbeats and knows if people are intimidated by him. So whenever I see him
I do my best not to show my pulse has reached over 150 bpm.

After all these years, I forgot how much I hate him. I remember when I was a teenager; he "accidentally" came in to family bathroom when I was there. I kept screaming and shouting at him. And later thanked God that my bathroom was fixed ASAP so I won't have to go to the family bathroom and remember this embarrassing experience.

Today, standing in the flesh, facing me with his ever known rudeness, in no doubt of the feelings I had for him, and certain that today I despise him more than ever and hated the sound of his name, staring at me without a blink. I gaze at him telling myself "I'm strong enough to face him. He's nothing. I'll survive this moment and will brag about it later" which I'm not sure of right now.

I decided to act like him. He stares, I stare back. He says nothing, I say nothing too. He pretends to ignore me. I pretend to ignore him too. He stands there silently; I'm silent still… until I came to my senses and remembered I'm all by myself and the last thing on earth I would want is to be with him in the same room with no one else around. All my fears for this moment were what if he steps in?

I was working on a piece of art, using a trimmer and wooden tools, my hand grabbed the nearest scalpel. Yes, I used scalpels and I have many sizes. Holding the scalpel in my hands, raised it to make sure he'll notice it I said with a firm voice "addamorrak, agga6i3ak, ashari7ak… etha tfakir tidkhul" (I'll destroy you, cut you into pieces, and dissect you… if you think of coming in).

To tell you the truth, I'm not sure if he understood a word but I'm sure these words were enough to alarm him and that's how he decided to wait until I was not looking at him so he can escape from the opening between the ceiling and the door and save face. Lizards!

After I graduated from the 4th grade, during the summer when I had a very long curly hair, I used to tie my pony tail really high so the hair won't touch my neck. I was playing at our neighbors' garden with my sister and their two daughters. Their two young men cousins where staying with them so they were in the garden to witness the scene. The girls and I were playing with dolls and I felt my hair was on my arm. It ticked me so I pulled my hair to the other side. Something was still there and that's when I started shouting and running, followed by the girls, all hurrying towards my house and some other kids from the street started running with us.

I went in to my mom, crying and telling her: "I looked at him while he was standing on my arm… I moved my arm… he looked at me... He ran towards my hand… then looked left and right as if he's crossing a street and then went to the finger in the middle and jumped to the porch". He was very tiny that you may see his guts through his pink skin. That summer I was no longer the girl with the long hair.

In the year 2000, I moved to bigger room which had a bigger window the only door to the backyard garden that was known as Attawie's garden. I was very excited about having a bigger room and a garden for myself. I kept dreaming about making it something like "7adeeqat Ommi" (my mother's garden) the one I used to see in Sandy Bell cartoon. All my dreams went in vain with the first visit paid by a huge gigantic lizard. The door was locked ever since and was covered from all sides with sponge and wood.

My mother is a real Lizard-buster. Even neighbors used to call her to help them with such situation. She has a broom stick that she used only for the purpose of killing this creature, in addition to a sort of pest control gun with a formula called "nogoss" (if that's the right spelling). He was able to hi that huge lizard but it wasn't enough to kill him. But he disappeared. After about a month he appeared in my sister's room with two tails! He started to appear several times here and there and no one could catch him. We started calling him "abu thailain" (the one with two tails)

Then he paid me another visit and disappeared. I saw him leave the room but nobody outside the room saw him coming out. After a while a small lizard was about to enter my room and disappeared! I thought there must be a reason why lizards disappear next to my door. That's when I discovered that there was a missing piece of wood on the top of my door where lizard can get inside the door itself. We covered the place of the missing piece with a sticking tape as well as the whole of the lock. I left the door open for days until I could touch the handle. Eventually I forgot about it.
The next summer, I heard scratching sound and a weird screaming sound but not of a human. Then a wounded average-sized lizard came out followed by "abu thailain"! I left the room and things were taken care of by my mother and I don't even want to know the rest of the story.

That's all for now
And I hope I won't see a lizard again

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Blogger MixMax said...

It has been many and many and many years I didn't see your late night visitor.

You might consider me lucky because I won't do the trace and hit by na2al, or use a rock when is seen outside in the garden, or play the prey and the predator game by pointing sechim gun at him and shooot!

Loved that post, not for the Lizard, but for some reason I thought you were talking about some real person you met after all these years.

3/27/2009 6:03 PM  
Blogger khalid jarrar said...

hahaha :DD

so cute :D :D :D

poor little bre9i!! i feel bad for all the little creatures living their lives peacefully, until oneday they wake up eyes half closed still and walk to go get some food, and suddenly they see a crazy iraqi with short hair screaming her lungs out at it, and soon suddenly 3oodat il moknasa hitting him!

haha i am sorry your sorry made me laugh and it was very well written but it made me sympathize with the lizard more than with you:P

hahaha :D

how are you miss atta? :) :) :)
2ish2akoooo 2ishmakooo? :D

la khabaar la chaffiyyah la 7amo`6 7ilo la sharbat?! :D

3/28/2009 2:10 AM  
Blogger attawie said...

I haven't seen "him" since I left Iraq late 2003. you're lucky. I bet they consider it a nice pet where you are right now.

If you liked this style then check this previous post

Little bre9i!!!! and poor!!!! sympathize with that creature!
You're so banned in here.

I'm fine and kulshi ako but you're not updated unless you pick a side; me or the bre9i as you like to call it :|

I just discovered I don't know how to add a link in the comment section!

3/28/2009 10:44 PM  
Blogger David said...

You had me going there too Attawie! At first I was thinking some sort of evil person was stalking you. Then I thought that you were being chased by a demon from your imagination. Then you revealed your nemesis to be....lizards! ;)

I remember Anarki talking about the fierce Baghdadi geckos. :D

So, the worst of them had two tails. I have seen a couple of lizards with two tails. Many lizards have tails that break off very easily. It is a defense mechanism. The broken off tail wiggles violently and distracts the predator while the lizard escapes. The tails regenerate, usually with only one, but occasionally two tails will grow back to replace the lost one.

I used to keep pet lizards, so I learned a lot about them. :)

I have to agree with Khalid, I felt sorry for the lizards in your story. Hope I'm not banned too! ;)

3/29/2009 10:39 AM  
Blogger attawie said...

That lizard was Evil and Stalking me! He IS an undercover demon disguised as a Baghdadi geckos!

You are so banned!

What's wrong with you guys? you feel sorry for that creature and not me! I'm deleting your comments, or better I'm saving you IPs to block you :P

*not talking*

3/29/2009 4:02 PM  
Blogger Sana said...

Sis, can you please stop talking about them, or writing??? i cant sleep any more :D
i still remember you running in the street that day, Me, Noor, Sara and the guys were laughing about you :D
we had fun that night :D thanks to u :D
loved the post coz u made me remember those days.

3/29/2009 9:52 PM  
Blogger khalid jarrar said...

hahaha :D

alright alright,

poor aby bre9 is not really poor, he is apparentely and without a doubt an ill intentioned stalking abu bre9, every single one that you ever countered, and hence they totally deserved what happened to them, they had it coming!

mean, mean horrible abu bre9!

am i forgiven? :D :D :D

yalla update please please please pretty please with sugar and a cherry on top? :D

3/30/2009 10:29 PM  
Blogger attawie said...

Sue tidalaleen
I'll remind you of other story soon but I'm afraid you won't like to read more about abu bre9at :P

oh and btw don't read the next lines :D

So Khalid,
Are you sure you're on my side and not saying that just to extract an update from me?

You'll get an update about abu bre9 and not me, until I make sure you're on the right side.

Yesterday I went to my mash'3al and I found a dead tiny abu bre9 in the clothe that I use to cover the mud trolley. Luckily I was wearing gloves. I called dad to rescue me :D

Actually I remembered how the three of you pitied the creature and guess what! I didn't scream :)

3/30/2009 11:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Poor lizards... :(

3/31/2009 12:36 AM  
Blogger attawie said...


one word:


hey you're here :D welcome, it's been ages. tell me you posted something :) *runs to check Mel's blog*

*comes back empty handed*

Post another photo and I won't ban you :P how about that? :D

3/31/2009 12:40 AM  
Blogger David said...

Attawie, that was so brave of you not to scream at the tiny dead baby lizard! ;)

In the Indianapolis Zoo, there are some very majestic lizards. They are called blue iguanas and are native to some islands in the Caribbean. They are about one meter long with very horny blue green scales and spikes all down their backs. But, they are very placid and eat only fruits and vegetables. Would you like to come here to see the blue iguanas? :)

3/31/2009 6:53 AM  
Blogger David said...

There is a very nice picture of a blue iguana here if you are feeling especially courageous. ;)

3/31/2009 7:15 AM  
Blogger attawie said...

:O About one meter! That's almost a crocodile!

I'm so not going to those Caribbean islands. I don't want to see any sort of lizards, not even a creature in that family and not a kin.

btw, I'm courageous to look at them. Actually I googled for their photos to attach them to the post and I couldn't find the type i'm talking about and then I thought some readers might not feel to read.

and David, you're not helping yourself. You're name is still on my black list.

3/31/2009 2:44 PM  
Blogger David said...

One meter is just a baby crocodile. ;) Very old Nile crocodiles might be 7 meters long!

I am glad you are feeling courageous to look at pictures. :) Here try this one and see if it looks like the little demons you remember. This is a type of gecko that is related to those that live in Iraq.

3/31/2009 9:58 PM  
Blogger attawie said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

3/31/2009 11:13 PM  
Blogger attawie said...

David :|

I checked the link and all the links in it. none of them looks like the iraqi gecko nor the one that looks like them i saw here! none of them!

anyways, after watching all these kinds I think I can say the ones we have are... *trying to announce it in a sort of neutral way*.. they are.. cuter.


3/31/2009 11:15 PM  
Blogger khalid jarrar said...

i totally absoultely am on your side, my relation with the abu bre9 is totally over, it was meaningless fun only! all i care about is your update!


yalla prey tell!

4/01/2009 1:17 AM  
Blogger David said...

Hmmm, your Iraqi gecko is a mystery creature. ;)

Ah, so your nemesis is cute now. Maybe you would like to have a stuffed lizard toy to decorate your room? When your sister comes by to visit, you can surprise her with it! :D

4/01/2009 10:10 AM  
Blogger attawie said...

You're forgive :) but how come I'm supposed to give an update and you're not! why still not posting?

I had a plastic lizard once. I wrote about it, remember? :)

oh and you're still on the black list. why don't you save yourself by talking about cheesecake and cookies instead :P

4/01/2009 2:27 PM  
Blogger attawie said...

that's forgiven* :)

4/01/2009 2:28 PM  
Blogger moonlight said...

hhhhhhh my mother hates "him" as much as you do. She has so many stories of her reactions and where she's seen them. even now she refuses to look at pictures of them and doesn't let my brother buy a toy lizard.
love your blog btw

4/02/2009 12:56 AM  
Blogger attawie said...

Moonlight :)

Maybe your mom and I can co-found the "I hate abu bre9" club :)

Welcome here dear.

4/02/2009 1:38 AM  
Blogger David said...

I am sorry Attawie, but I have forgotten your post about the plastic lizard. Could you give me the link to refresh my memory? :)

Well, maybe I am deep enough in the dog house, so I will not kid you anymore about "him". ;)

How would you like some blueberry coffee cake (its not made with coffee, but its sometimes served with coffee)? It has a bit of brown sugar sprinkled on top and is really delicious. :D

4/02/2009 9:56 AM  
Blogger moonlight said...

haha, my mom would love that....just beware of those who find it funny to scare you :P.

4/03/2009 12:35 AM  
Blogger attawie said...

David, I checked my archive and I couldn't find a post about it but I just remembered it was written in a comment. Can't remember which post but if you recall i was mixing between "robe" and rope" :D remember?

so, that sounds yummy, send me a piece but no coffee for me :D

As long as Khalid and David are away we can be safe :D

4/03/2009 12:43 AM  
Blogger moonlight said...

*remebers the times when she ganged up with 5aloo and sister* I wouldn't be so sure about that =D.

4/03/2009 5:36 AM  
Blogger زهرة الراوي said...

يكولون اللي يخاف من أبو بريص يجيله !!
لا اعلم صحة المقولة، لكني أحاول أن أفهم كل "واحد" أقابله منهم أني لا أخافهم :)

أسلوبك جداً رائع، وطريقة السرد المواربة تلائمك جداً ..
دمتِ بخير

4/25/2009 8:07 PM  
Blogger attawie said...

عزيزتي زهرة
سمعت كثراً عن هذا و حتى اني سمعت انه يسمع دقات القلب ليعرف من يخاف منه.. لذلك كلما يواجهني احاول اني اتظاهر باللامبالاه و اقول انا لستُ بخائفة

فأتصور ان الحال من بعضه

4/25/2009 10:10 PM  

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